I Caught Myself

Down to you
You're pushing and pulling me down to you
But I don't know what I
Now when I caught myself
I had to stop myself
From saying something
That I should've never thought
Now when I caught myself
I had to stop myself
From saying something
That I should've never thought of you 

You're pushing and pulling me down to you
But I don't know what I want
No, I don't know what I want

You got it you got it
Some kind of magic
Hypnotic hypnotic
You're leaving me breathless
I hate this I hate this
You're not the one I believe in
With God as my witness

Now when I caught myself
I had to stop myself
From saying something
That I should've never thought
Now when I caught myself
I had to stop myself
From saying something
That I should've never thought of you of you

You're pushing and pulling me down to you
But I don't know what I want
No, I don't know what I want

Don't know what I want
But I know it's not you
Keep pushing and pulling me down
When I know in my heart it's not you

Now when I caught myself
I had to stop myself
I'm saying something
That I should have never thought
Now when I caught myself
I had to stop myself
I'm saying something
That I should've never thought of you

I knew, I know in my heart it's not you
I knew, but now I know what I want, I want, I want
Oh no, I've should have never thought

~ Paramore

Don't Tempt Me

We all want what we can't have. In fact, most of the time we only want things because they are unavailable or forbidden. To justify the purchase, we convince ourselves that what we want so desperately is also what we need. The trouble is, impulse purchases can often lead to en expensive case of buyer's remorse. 

~ from "Ghostgirl: Homecoming" by Tonya Hurley

Life is Short

Always On My Mind

Stop This Song (Lovesick Melody)

Forget Me Not. Northern Cross.

I can no longer remember the start of this journey. 
Before I realized, I was already here. 
As the seasons wore away, 
Those who sense the invisible infrared rays become lost.

I will probably lose them, 
These feelings that I risk my life for. 
I loved as if I were fighting to survive. 
I spent all my time building my dream. 
I wanted to land on that star. 
I wanted to fly in your sky.

Wouldn't someone please caress my empty contours?
Pushed on by the beating of in my chest, these words of love rolled out of my mouth. 
But no one answers them, and I don't know what to do. 
Chosen by destiny, the Northern Star is burning bright. 
Though it snatched you away from me into the sooty darkness, 
You continued to smile so gracefully. I loved that part of you.

If you are gone, then there's no meaning left to life.
I don't care if everyone disappeared. 
If my love is gone, then I have no more use for my heart. 
This world can just disappear.

I was always in pain.
I would risk my life for that first time we met. 
I dreamt as if I were struggling to breathe. 
I reached my hands out blindly. 
I wanted to listen to your heartbeat. 
I wanted to build a rainbow with you.

Wouldn't someone please embrace me tightly with daybreak's sentimentality.
Tears of love that scatter as they are repelled by orbits of dreams will do. 
Their painful flow is just fine for me. 
Called back by destiny, the Northern Star is crying. 
If I have to survive in this labyrinth anyway, 
I want to die loving you to my last breath.

And it will begin, 
The finale I will risk my life for.
I loved as if I were fighting to survive.
I kicked on dreams on until they are crumpled.
I wanted to end on that star.
I wanted to bloom in your sky.

Wouldn't someone please caress my empty contours?
The motions of time have erased away
The words of love that could not be saved.
So please, give me your answer one more time.
Chosen by destiny, the Northern Star is burning bright.
Though it snatched you away from me into the sooty darkness,
You continued to smile so gracefully. I loved that part of you. 

- Yoko Kanno, Yuho Iwasato & Gabriela Robin

Oblivious

The truth is that ever since
I realized I could fly in the sky
I’ve been too afraid to flap my wings,
and I’ve forgotten the wind

oblivious
Where are we headed?
Far off in the distance we can see a mirage
Which although we fear it
Will show us our future someday

When our shelterless hearts
drew close together
Look, true sorrow has
spread apart its wings

oblivious
In the night
Like a dream of midday shadows
I’m sure we shall fall
Toward the light

Someday, with you
Night, morning, afternoon,
stars, illusion
Summer, winter, time, wind
Water, earth, sky
we go further in the destiny

oblivious
Stay close to me
Look, a silent love begins
Someday we will shiver
As we head toward our future

oblivious
Where are we headed?
We flee into the distance
underneath the water
What a beautiful voice

Sing aloud
Our future

~ Yuki  Kajiura